Stronger

Yesterday: Tax returns came in the mail. Somehow, a return had been delivered in care of Robert D Day.   The moment took me off guard. "Meh.", says I and simply shuffled it to the back of the pile of mail and continued as if I never saw it at all!  I texted him to let him know that I'd be delivering today.  Then, I continued about my afternoon.  This said, my friends are probably making a collective gasp...and sigh...I have arrived.

Two years ago: My life, as I knew it, came crashing down around my alligator loafers.  There was a walk out, a break up, a "get back together", another break up, a move out, another "get back together", and then a final break up...the final.  It took a year, many lost friendships, a few broken hearts, and a few "do over friendships" , apologies, and very unbalanced emotions.  A definite life changing situation.  Through all of it, I managed to stay true to myself...never made promises I couldn't keep...and basically kept myself protected.  I found myself...I found my soul...I got my groove back.  And at the two year(ish) anniversary I HAVE ARRIVED!!!

Today: I'm not a Kelly Clarkson fan, but I am a fan of Steel Magnolias.  One of the many inspirational lines deliverd is "That which does not kill us, makes us stronger."  I've always believd this.  I found this "hit song" by Kelly Clarkson and decided to use it as my "personal anthem" today.  I have finally arrived...I am something he will never be...stronger.

Knowing The Genteel Rogue: Round Two

I asked a delicious young man to help me out with the development of these questions.  He obliged and the texting started.  Actually, the texting is still happening.  The questions are very good...I'm sure my therapist has asked me a few of these...

Do you take the shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

I recall being in Key West one year and got hooked on Key West Aloe products that the cleaning staff would leave in the room each day.  So, I think I took those.  I do know that I still use the products...stocking up when I go down there and even online orders.

Least favorite movie?

I don't have any particular least favorite movie.  I try to find something good in everything.  I don't like westerns, most romances, action, or ridiculous comedies...I like dry humor...sarcasm...and an occasional slapstick classic.

Would you ever strip or pose for a magazine?

I assume this would be posing nude...um, no.  It's just not for me.

What did you want to be when you grew up, as a child?

I remember that I was always creative...I think I wanted to be an artist.

Ever won a spelling bee?

No.  And I never tried.

Ever cry because you were so happy?

Yes, I'm sure.  I don't like to wear my heart on my sleeve.  I consider it to be weak.  However, I do cry in private...both in happiness and sadness.

First concert?

I think it was a symphony...not sure.  I can't remember.

Favorite fruit pie?

PEACH!

Do you celebrate 420?

I could play ignorant, but I won't.  I haven't celebrated that day in years.

Ever kick a vending machine?

Not only have I kicked a vending machine...I knocked one over.

At what age did you discover Santa wasn't real?

I had to be 11 or 12...I took it very hard.  Now, I have learned that he IS real...or at least the spirit is.

Favorite girls/boys name?

I have to say my brother did well...he has two beautiful children and I adore their names.  Jon Mitchell and Ashton Thayer.

Would you survive in prison?

I was in the US Navy...therefore, I think I could survive anything after such a life lesson.  Prison and the Navy are very different.  But, I would probably survive.

What song best describes your life right now?

wooooow...that's an entire post. 

What's your favorite word?

EXQUISITE

Knowing The Genteel Rogue: Round One

I'm sure everyone that blogs goes through this topic a few times, at least.  The topic of "favorites".  The trouble really comes when the answers are multiple.  And the longer I live, the longer the multiples list becomes.  Here is what I know for a fact...this week.

Color(s): Purple and Orange.  Purple is that really spiritual color that dazzles with it's various shades from cool to warm.  I've been told that radiant purples bring out my blue eyes.  The color orange is the same way.  It can be cheerful, comfortable, rustic, chic, all kinds of emotions with this color...

Comfort food(s): Definitely starchy foods.  Creamy, cheesy, and salty.  Mac and Cheese is one of my favorite comfort foods since I was a kid.  Thick soups and stews make me warm inside, too.  Warm, buttery mashed potatoes make me feel like I'm at home.

Flower(s): Jasmine, for the exotic perfume...orchids, for the graceful lines...gardenias, because it's nostalgic and beautiful.  My all time favorite is the Stargazer Lily...because it always has been...it's tried and true.

Dream Vacation Spot: I've been to some amazing places...but, if I had to choose a "dream vacation" it would be on an island or beach...a seashore...perhaps in the Med...Capri or Istanbul, Turkey.

Author(s): Hemingway, Tennessee Williams, Faulkner, Walt Whitman, Mark Twain...my tastes lie in reading about adventure, home, passion, humor, ideas...

Movie(s): All time favorite is Auntie Mame with Rosalind Russell...Harvey with James Stewart is another...most current favorite is Midnight In Paris.

Phobia(s): I can honestly say that I'm not afraid of much.  Snakes are an immediate turn off...but, I don't usually seek them out.  If it were the 19th century, I might be afraid of being buried alive.  Being trapped underwater, deep caves, and tight spaces freak me out a little.

 

Monday..."moon day"

I had a teacher that used to say that his favorite day was Monday.  At the time, I thought he was absolutely mad.  Actually, a decade or so after high school, it was confirmed.  He now rests in a padded room somewhere outside Nashville.  Not claiming lunacy (that's a given), but I LOVE Mondays, too!!  The word Monday derives from the Middle English "monedaei" between 1000 and 1200, translated "moon day".  The placement of "moon day" is second to Sunday...or "sun day".  Sunday and Monday's  pagan beginnings honor the sun and moon...being "father" and "mother"   The Roman pagan goddess, Luna (or Diana) is given the honor of bearing the name...and all the science, history, mythology, and superstitions associated with the moon. 

Okay, so maybe I'm a bit of a lunatic.  Anyway, to start the week off right, I found my new "Happy Moon Day" dance...

Desire To Inspire

Lately, I've either been too busy, too tired, too burnt, or simply uninspired to write...anything!  I try to stay inspired because, as awkward it seems, I am inspiration.  I inspire.  This makes me feel very strong...and very weak.  I could list all of my inspirations...people, places, things...all.  This would be a monumental thing!  Emotions inspire me, actions, reactions, ideas, solutions...I seem to "hover" or "dwell" over everything a little longer than most...as not to forget it.  I seem to gravitate to music, poetry, and art to inspire me...great masterpieces to Bohemian expression...great, wise men and women of logic and spirituality. 

So, that said I happened across this YouTube video (a very popular video, in fact) some time ago and I watch it a few times a week, for...inspiration.  It wasn't until today that it hit me...look inside.  Inspiration is inside all of us...we need only to realize that it's there.  I look back on everything that inspires me...before,  I would have never put myself on that list.  Now, I believe that inspiration is a shared gift.  We take it, we give, we find in ourselves, we give, and we take again...

Here's that video, may it unlock the "inner child" that desires to be "grown up"...and the "grown up" that desires to be that "inner child".

Genteel: Another Juggling Act

As most days, I check my horoscope via facebook.  I'm always amused at what the stars have in store for me.  Like my friend Michelle, I seem to run just a little behind...perhaps by a day...celestially, speaking.

 

"Talk about multitasking. You've always been nothing if not amazingly gifted when it comes to juggling duties -- but you'll be even more adept now. If you have time to stop for a split second, you might even see a crowd forming."

After being sick and a little slow to recover last week, I know there's going to be a lot of catching up to do throughout the week.  I thought to put this "to do" list on paper.  My plate may be full, but I always come to the table with a fork and a spoon!  The best thing is that my best "color" for the day is orange and my "mood" is destined to be cheerful!!!

tags for car, gas up, hair cut, laundry (never ending task), LULA's bath, vacuum, mop, change linens, type turorials for WF, make trip to WF to install collections, review floor set for BB, pick up supplies, grocery shopping (ever daunting task), pay bills, purchase tickets, schedule meetings, plan "Speakeasy" and "Junebugs", cardio, and ...I'm sure there are a few more things to do...today!!!

I'm Ill...

Sucky blogging for the past few days and may continue until I'm back in the game.  Until then stay well, be good, and play nice with the villagers.  Mayhem will resume soon enough.

Full Moon Balancing Act

Last night, though there was cloud cover, the first full moon rose over the Bluff City.  I've always loved been one of the "crazies" who gets into the hype surrounding full moons.  I'm a Cancer in the zodiac and my personality is said to be linked to the cycles of the moon...especially when it's full.  It brings out the best and the worst in most people.  I read up on what this particular moon could mean for me and it was all about the work/life balance.  I do work...but, it's a labor of love.  Yesterday, I spent most of the day and into the evening working away at the museum.  It's a season change and an exhibit change...in addition, I feel that things need to be rearranged a little to create local interest.  (Told ya, labor of love)  When I got home, I was so wired up, I couldn't sleep.  I tried to relax, meditate, exhaust myself cleaning, etc...but, nothing seemed to do the trick.  I blame the full moon for restlessness, but I'm giving the goal for this "full moon opportunity" serious consideration.  Balance.  I think I do a great job at balance...others, not so much.  The museum is a passion...it needs to be fed.  When I get burned out, I step back.  I do get to escape the 19th century with my part-time at Brooks Brothers...but, it still keeps my mind occupied day and night with ideas.  I entertain frequently, so that helps out with the "life" balance.  But, there's something missing.  The expression "Ask Mother" comes to mind, but I know what she'll say.  "You need to find a relationship."  Ugh...just when I thought I had it all together, Mother comes along with a whole other can of worms!  So, I'll continue to work at my work/life balancing act...because, I see now that it's more of a juggling act...and, as Mother would have it, a relationship...would help work out the kinks.  Maybe, February's full moon.

Genteel: Gypsy Stew

One of my genuine passions is to feed my friends.  I dare say I've ever taken a complaint about anything that I cook, but it seems that my soups are the most satisfying...no matter what it is.  I create a lot of recipes, just throwing in some of this, a little of that, a dash here, a sprinkle there...last night's stew threw up a few red flags for folks.  If I had told them it was a take on Italian wedding soup, they would have been fine.  I called it "gypsy stew".  Jon even sent a text, having read the announcement on FB, which is in his grand nature to do...Jon: "Can we order pizza?"  Me: "Jon, I have soup..." (Lunsford, already present and forever faithful, tried to calm me down as he could see the flames forming on the sides of my face.)  Jon: "I know, Gypsy-style stew, a recipe you haven't tried before...so, pizza?" (Me to Lunsford, "Those bitches"  Lunsford to Me: "How dare they...!")  As the story turns out, Jon was joking with me...as usual.  And Mr. "Can we order pizza?" had three heaping bowls, as seen with #3 here...

I promised to post the recipe...so here it is with a few images.  It was really fulfilling...it's a keeper!

Dice two large white onions and mince two cloves garlic...sautee with olive oil

Add 1 pkg frozen sliced carrots, 1 pkg frozen french style green beans, 1 pkg of gnocchi dumplings

Cover with sodium free/fat free chicken stock...simmer...add one large can cream of chicken soup

Add any kind of sliced chicken/turkey sausage (mine had garlic and spinach in it)...cook through

Add 2 cans of white beans and 2 cans of chickpeas and 2 handfuls of fresh spinach leaves

I used about 2 tablespoons of ground pepper and 3 tablespoons of turmeric...a pinch of salt, too

It can't be screwed up...just add what you like and what balances and what compliments each ingredient.  I feel if you prepare it with a little soul, a dash of love, a cup or two of wine, and some fantastic music...it makes for a more satisfying dish.  The more fresh veggies the better, if you have the time.  I used turmeric, because it's loaded with amazing healing properties for the liver! 

I Got Nothin'...(as LULA rolls her eyes)

Lackluster attempts to post this morning are met with blank, expressionless stares from LULA.  Just sitting in front of a screen, blank...completely blank. If LULA could speak, I'm sure she'd sass something like this, "Give it up, honey...you're just not that cute or insightful in the morning." (the bitch!)  Maybe, I'll be inspired by afternoon or evening to have a genuine post.  If not, please talk amongst yourselves and play nice.  And, enjoy the mix...

Genteel: Random Questions Not Frequently Asked

1. What kind of SOAP is in your bathtub right now?

Dove Men+Care body and face bar

2. Do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator?

Usually in the summer, but not now...I do have strawberries, though.

3. What would you change about your living room?

technically, I have a parlor...and I'm always changing things.  So, is it fair to say everything in time and nothing at the moment?

4. Are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty?

There aren't any dishes in the dishwasher...still in the sink.

5. What is in your fridge?

a few leftovers, homemade pimento and cheese, a half eaten quiche from this AM, a few condiments, eggs, cheese, bottles of water, orange and tomato juice, and milk

6. White or wheat bread?
wheat

7. What is on top of your refrigerator?
antique bent wood picnic basket

8. What color or design is on your shower curtain?
plaid

9. How many plants are in your home?
4

10. Is your bed made right now?
No...just up from a nap. 

11. Comet or Soft Scrub?

I use Method products...more like soft scrub.

12. Is your closet organized?

Oranized chaos...only I go in there.

13. Can you describe your flashlight?

It's called a candle...I kick it "old school".

14. Do you drink out of glass or plastic most of the time at home?

glass

15. Do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now?
Yes.

16. If you have a garage, is it cluttered?

Next question.

17. Curtains or blinds?

Blinds throughout, burlap drapes, and heavy drapes in bedroom...'cause it's sexy.

18. How many pillows do you sleep with?

4

19. Do you sleep with any lights on at night?

yes, my "wine" light...in the kitchen and my antique lamp in the parlor, and four art spotlights in the parlor and salon.

20. How often do you vacuum?

A few times a week...LULA's white hair is a pain in the arse!

21. Standard toothbrush or electric?

Standard

22. What color is your toothbrush?

green

23. Do you have a welcome mat on your front porch?

Of course, it would be considered "unSouthern" not to.

24. What is in your oven right now?

a baking stone

25. Is there anything under your bed?

no

26. The chore you hate the most?

laundry

27. What retro items are in your home?

Are you kidding?  I live in a virtual museum...98% of the entire place is antique...even the guy who lives here is an antique!

28. Do you have a separate room that you use as an office?

Yes. I call it the salon...it has a desk, chairs, a chaise lounge, small table, TV, and lamp...oh, and Victor (my cherished terracotta bust).

29. How many mirrors are in your home?

3

30. Do you have any hidden emergency money around your home?

Not really, just change dishes that I sometimes find a few bills in from time to time.

31. What color are your walls?

A deep mustard gold with high gloss black trim.  The back wall in the kitchen is cinnamon, bathroom is olive, and one wall in the salon is papered with pages from Tennessee Williams' plays.

32. Do you keep any kind of protection weapons in your home?

LULA, my pitbull...does she count?  (The only threat there is that she would kiss you to death...her looks are intimidating, however.)

33. What does your home smell like right now?

Tyler's English Ivy

34. Favorite candle scent?

Archipelago's Havana

35. What kind of pickles (if any) are in your refrigerator right now?

Bubbie's bread and butter pickle chips.

36. What color is your favorite Bible?

I don't own a bible...my grimmoire is black.

37. Ever been on your roof?

Yes...during construction when the front of the roof was being reset.

38. Do you own a stereo?

I have a small portable AM/FM with an ipod dock.

39. How many TVs do you have?

1...a flat screen in the salon...and it's plenty.

40. How many house phones?

I only have my cellular.

41. Do you have a housekeeper?

Yes, moi.

42. What style do you decorate in?

I like to tell folks that it's  Napoleanic New Orleans meets Old Town Key West...for the most part, it looks like my personality.

43. Do you like solid colors in furniture or prints?

I have alot of leather...some print upholstered pieces...wicker...lots of print pillows...so, yes.

44. Is there a smoke detector in your home?

yes

45. In case of fire, what are the items in your house which you'd grab if you only could make one quick trip?

My file box, computer, phone, keys, wallet...all can be thrown into my shoulder bag.  Meds, LULA, and Abby's ashes.

Rogue: The Original Bitch and Gay Marriage

Yesterday, a friend and I found ourselves on the topic of Lilith.  I told her that I would do some research and post what I found.  WOW!  There's a ton of information about her.  And, oddly enough was completely left out of some holy scriptures.  Now, if I had to put her in modern perspective I would call her a world class bitch...the original, even.  She is the supposed first wife of Adam.  She came from the same dust and was not created from one of Adam's ribs like Eve.  Therefore, she demanded equality.  Things didn't work out for she and Adam, so she left the garden...she became a night demon with talons and wings and literally "flew the coop".  Her punishment from the almighty was to "loose 100 of her children each day"...she, being a liberated woman, took vengeance on all women and and their offspring.  Lilith also had a mission to create her "family" of demons to seek out and destroy.  She developed a reputation for...being a man hating bitch that was fixed on destroying life. 

I can just imagine that conversation in the garden of Eden. A bright, sun-shiny day...birds chirping...etc. 

Adam: "Woman, you are my wife, you shall submit to me!" 

Lilith: "Whatever, I'm outta' here."

As I read it, equality has always been a struggle...this should be considered the original sin.  The official original sin is just too much fun to be what I call a sin (something bad).  Which leads me to gay marriage, I'm for it...because it's a legal union that just happens to have holy scripture supporting it's arrangement...and I'm gay and want the same rights.  And here's my "smack in the head" to all the haters: Lilith left (divorced) Adam after a short while (like most hetero Hollywood couples) ..and their marriage was holy...designed by and in sight of the almighty.  So, aren't the crazies that denounce gay marriage, because of reckless lifestyles, a little daft to think these heterosexual, perfect, "by the book" marriages (in the sight of the almighty)...superior to gay marriage in the eyes of God?  Who the hell are you to judge?  Clearly, these crazies believe their book is better than mine.  I guess all of us homos need to grow talons and wings, leave the "garden", and join Lilith.  For all we know, she currently resides in Nirvana and vacations in the state of Bliss. 

Here's something a little more detailed about Lilith to watch...it's really interesting!

Rogue: Resolutions

During what turned out to be a charming supper with an equally charming gentleman, the topic of resolutions came up.  He and his friends had decided in lieu of making resolutions, they would just DO something to or for another friend each month.  I like this concept.  It seems genuine enough...or at least the thought behind it. 

I don't make resolutions either.  Rather, I make promises... and threats through the year.  Such as, I promise to dedicate more time to housekeeping...or I swear I'm not above kicking your ass!  I don't make resolutions because it basically means to resolve to do something for good.  If it's really that good that you need to make a big deal out of it by broadcasting it to all of God's creation...shouldn't you have been doing it all along?  Or, maybe you are but, never knowing.

Do it or Don't...either way, life goes on (until Dec. 21, 2012 according to the Mayans...and yes, they might have had a clue or two...they did discover chocolate...just sayin').  In the spirit of  "DO something every month", I have decided to draw up the official "Rogue DOers Promises and Threats for 2012"

January: Champs, scotch, and absinthe (in that order).

February: Chocolate...and sex.  Then sex with chocolate.

March: "Killing Off" a few frienemies one at a time.

April: Cash in the "golden egg" after Tax Day. 

May: BBQ and beer(the cold, cheap kind...and lots of it).

June: Protest Marriage and Celebrate Divorce.

July: Connect with my "inner Hemingway"...hide the rum.

August: Public Nudity, Cold Gin, and black light the tonic.

September: Random Fall Fashion Citations.

October: Dance in the graveyard at midnight...with a priest.

November: Serve tofu turkey and sushi for Thanksgiving.

December: Sell everything and throw a "World's End" party



Genteel: Brooks Brothers, Fred Astaire, and Dancing Bears

I'm headed out to Brooks Brothers (my official employment) today.  We're beginning our winter clearance today and I have tons of new spring merchandise!!  This excites me in several ways.  First, by October I get so tired of seeing all the dark colors of the fall/winter season.  It's nice to get fresh goods in.  Second, I'm really in the mood for polos and ribbon belts, bow ties and seersucker.  Of course, by July I will be tired of this, too.  So, the change of season is always refreshing. 

Before I leave for the day, I wanted to share a classy little number by Mr. Fred Astaire.  Granted, he doesn't fall in the realms of my Golden Age thinking (I'll explain that later).  He is however a classic...and one hell of a dancer.  Astaire is credited with using a Brooks Brothers repp stripe tie as a belt...in turn making way for the contemporary ribbon belt. 

My friends Gary and Brent actually took some tap classes this fall.  I thought it was a little silly, but now I think it would be so cool to try it out.  I haven't see their progress, but I'm sure that a recital would be in order this spring.  I've seen dancing bears at the circus, but never seen tap dancing bears...ever!   Now, that's one show I'm NOT going to miss!  I'd be their biggest fan!

Laurel & Hardy - Dancing (Parov Stelar - Libella Swing)

...another version I found of Parov Stelar's Libella Swing...an instant classic for me!

Parov Stelar - Libella Swing.

Genteel: Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior

A few years ago, I began to question whether or not I was living my life as graciously as I should.  I struggled with myself and realised that I was lacking in guidance.  I thought that I always conducted myself as a gentleman.  And, was I wrong...dead wrong.  The last time I had such impeccable manners was nearly twenty years earlier when serving in the U.S. Navy.  (And, even then I was a rogue when the uniform came off. )

To get back on track I bought this little book, Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior...and Other Important Writings.  George Washington used these "rules" his entire life.  The 110 "rules" were a writing assignment for Washington sometime before he was 16.  But, the rules are actually based on a much older work, Bienseance de la Conversation entre les Hommes (Decency of Conversation among Men) written by Jesuit scholars in the late 16th century.   The book goes into other translations, moves across Europe, and then lands itself finally into the hands of a young George Washington in Colonial Virginia. 

Upon my first reading, I thought it to be a little difficult to understand (having to translate from 17th century composition).  Some of the maxims are silly, some are just plain common sense.  However, I have learned that even small mistakes can make for a disaster.  I'm finally back on track and try to live my life as graciously as I can with little social awkwardness.  I recommend this...not only as an etiquette guide, but as a guide to improve a full and healthy life. 

And if it worked for Washington, who is said to have had an incredibly short fuse, it can work for anyone willing to learn.  I'll probably start a project including the 110 "rules" and how I butcher these from time to time...I try, but nobody is perfect.

Best of Electro Swing 2011 - Blackstripes

Being Genteel Rogue

With the new year, it's time to pick up the pieces to my once seemingly shattered life, put on a fresh pair of shoes and never look back.  I know, it seems a little dramatic.  Seriously, it's time to be honest with myself...with anyone else, who has the pleasure or displeasure of crossing my path.

Every person has at least two sides to their personality.  I'm no different.  I have just as many virtues as I have vices.  For the most part I try to keep a "sunny disposition".  Some people question this moniker "Genteel Rogue" that I have chosen, "Is this the real you?".  I say yes, it is.  Some people consider me to have weak character...they are mistaken.

This blog offers two sides of the same coin.  "Genteel" will offer a more polite "me", while "Rogue" will confirm that I do have a wicked streak.  Enjoy the commentary, images, and more...or, don't.